What does stress do to you and your goals?
Facing Our Issues
There are soooo many stresses that you encounter daily, weekly, yearly, and
you think little about about them.
Then there are a few that stand out as being the most annoying, frightening,
and awful experiences of your life.
It’s not just Death and Taxes that are certainties in your life
It is also certain that no one’s life, no matter how well off, or
deprived it might be, no one escapes difficulties, uncertainty,
Will you know when you are going to experience one of these
difficult situations? The answer is Yes, and No.
You know when tax time comes around. You know when you
have an appointment with your doctor, you know when you
are late for work.
You did not expect to be pulled over by that police officer who just
happened to see you go through that stop sign. You told him it
was a stop, rolling, but still a stop, and he handed you a ticket.
You also did not expect to get caught in that traffic jam and
end up late for work. Your third time in as many days.
Which means that you didn’t expect to have to explain to
your boss why you were (again) late for work, and of course
you may not have expected to be fired on such short notice.
Setbacks will come in various forms, stages, and will be often untimely
Difficulties of many types will beset everyone at one time or another,
and will likely visit you on numerous occasions.Problems, and your reactions to the problems will vary from situation to situation.Some issues will seem bigger than others, and some not so important.
Why is that?
The basic reason is that life has taught you certain things. Among those”Life’s Lessons” that you have learned, you have developed both healthy and unhealthy attitudes toward various ideologies, people, and even life in general.
When a problem arises that requires you to make decisions you may
be faced with something that is important to you, or it may be just
another “Thing” for you to handle.
If you are the boss who has to fire someone, then the decision to fire an
employee may or not be a difficult one.
If the person is constantly late, doesn’t do his job, and argues with you, then what emotions have this person’s behaviors elicited in you, and how hard will it be to make your decision?
If this person is doing well, has a new family, is a hard worker, very likeable,
and has been doing a great job for 3 years, but due to cutbacks you have to
make the decision to end his employment without notice, or fire someone else who has more seniority on the job, but isn’t quite as good.
Now what would you do?
The limits that you set for your “Stress” convenience
Each time you encounter some uncomfortable situation, whether
it’s tax time, encounter time, deadline time, etc., you will experience
stress either at an emotional level, physical level, or both.
Emotions will have a major impact on how your perceptions of situations
are handled. Also, there are really only two ways it can go, that is
1. You can feel comfortable in a situation,
2. Or you can be threatened in some way, in the same identical situation.
When you are used to something, when you encounter a situation where
this “Something” shows up (person, pet, item, etc.), your emotions will
be bored, and you will go about business as usual.
Let’s say that you are afraid of spiders, and you walk out of your door only
to walk into that one spot, where only a spider could find, that spot that
spans your door frame and you have no choice but to walk into that
blasted spider web. Business as usual gets tossed out in favor of a
blood curdling scream.
Now you know that not everyone is afraid of spiders, just as not everyone is
afraid of snakes, math, flying in planes, people, and so on.
You may be one of the few who is afraid of golf, because you once were on the putting green half-bent over to sink that putt when you heard “Four”. Well, you were the only one who stood up to see what was happening and the ball hit you in the head and knocked you out. What were the chances.
Seriously, if you’re not afraid of something, someone else probably is.
Emotions play a major role in how you deal with stress.
Logically, you can know that what you fear is not realistic, but you are
still fearful. And, logically you know that it makes very little sense to be
afraid of something that is probably not going to give you any problems,
but you are still stressed when your “Nemesis” rears up on its hind legs
and lets you know it is watching.
You let your emotions tell you that it is “Better to be safe than sorry”.
This is the Emotional Convenience that I just referred to, and it makes
it easy for you to NOT get over irrational fears. Allowing your emotions
to be in charge, rather than your intellect and knowledge, is an
Emotional Convenience designed to continue the same pattern and
reaction to the same, or similar stimuli.
(I thought I’d throw in a touch of psychology talk).
You have experienced the physical side of things already, and you are aware
of what happens to you, and how you feel when you get nervous, fearful,
or confused. The bottom line is that you are dealing with variations of fear.
Yes, fear stresses and can be a major and “Stressful” sticking point to
getting things done, improving your finances, or simply surviving.
So, what are some of the things that are physically thrown at you when
you are stressed, and uncertain?
You have already experienced:
1. Increased muscle tension
2. Rising blood pressure
3. Your mouth getting dry
And, you’re still here.
The above are but a few of the many physiological changes that
take place when you are under stress.
When Stress and Performance Collide
When you are working on a project, no matter what it is, your performance
is affected by the situations (both good and bad) that you encounter.
When you reach what you consider a milestone achievement, and experience
a positive outcome, you have an automatic boost in self-confidence, and
in the motivation needed to continue your project or endeavor.
When you have a setback, or are confronted by a setback or situations
that stress you out, you may find yourself looking backward wondering why
you even began what you are now doing.
Your stresses will eat away at your self-confidence and motivation.
Depending on the severity of the stressors, you may find yourself
experiencing self-defeat and giving up.
Defeating self-defeat and overcoming the obstacles that get in
your way is one end of the spectrum.
The other end of this spectrum is just accepting
defeat, and quitting. There are many other stops on this colorful
spectrum of challenge such as:
- Completing your goal, but very slowly.
- Becoming an expert at procrastination.
- Amazing yourself by coming up with extraordinary excuses.
- Finishing ahead of schedule, but you have to do everything over.
- You finish, your results “Suck”, and you settle for less than your best.
Stress is usually caused by uncertainty and fear. When stress happens,
you can take many directions to reduce your stress. Depending on the
direction that you take, you can still be successful.
Now it’s your choice.
You can lower your expectations or . . .
You can just settle for less than your best.
Which will you choose?